Teenage Girls and Body Image: A Lesson For All Of Us
This post originally appeared on Food for Thought.
According to a study published in the March issue of the Journal of Health and Social Behavior (2010), teenage girls tend to compare their bodies more to their peers than they do to celebrities in the media. An article published recently by Nancy Tracy on this very subject points to the Social Comparison Theory, a psychological theory which holds that more often than not people tend to compare themselves more to people who are similar to themselves than to those who seem to be inferior or superior. So- for example, rather than comparing your cooking skills to someone who is featured on the Food Network, maybe you compare your cooking skills to those of your neighbor, sister, friend, cousin, etc. And the analogy follows with anything- your looks, your athletic ability, your body, etc. Anyways, what they found was that in schools where the average BMI (body mass index) was higher, girls felt less pressure to diet and be thin, whereas in schools where the average BMI was lower, girls felt increased pressure to be thinner.
I think that the results of this study are powerful in that they affirm what we might already know and experience about what happens when we make comparisons about ourselves to others- which is that often, we feel that we need to be something other than what we are. We feel like we don’t measure up to those around us, or that we are just not as good as so-and-so. Teenage girls might compare themselves to their peers more than they do to celebrities, but who knows what the statistics look like for adults (we probably compare ourselves equally to our peers and celebrities). I think the media still shapes and influences our standards of beauty in a way that we may never fully comprehend, but I think the act of comparing ourselves to others is an important thing to step back and evaluate.
Someone very smart once told me that “comparison is the thief of all joy” and that has stuck with me– it is so true! We are conditioned to look around us to see where we fit in the pecking order, and usually the act of comparing ourselves to others leads to feelings of inferiority, insecurity, anxiety, frustration, discontentment, and so on. Whenever we compare ourselves to others, we don’t usually feel better about ourselves- we feel worse! And on the rare occasion that we do feel better, the sense of confidence we gain from that is false and empty.
One quote (by Max Ehrmann) that I love which speaks to this: “If you compare yourself with others, you may become vain and bitter, for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself.” We all at times are so busy worrying about how we measure up that we lose out on being ourselves, and we aren’t able to enjoy who we were made to be. Another one of my favorite quotes is by Judy Garland- who said, “Be a first-rate version of yourself, rather than a second-rate version of someone else.” I think she had it right! We are the only ones who can be the best at being us- so let’s focus on that!! We all have strengths, talents and interests that make us unique and when we aren’t able to see those for what they are, we miss out (and so do others)! The next time you find yourself playing the comparison game, stop and consider your strengths, abilities and your beauty- both inner and outer. The idea is not to become vain or self-absorbed– but it is so important that we see ourselves for who we really are, rather than viewing ourselves through a filter that is designed to categorize and classify our worth based on another.
{ 72 comments… read them below or add one }
I think this is one of the hardest things to deal with. There are so many teens that think things like this and they never except the fact that they are BEAUTIFUL the way they are.
I completely agree. Being a 16 year old girl, I know this better than anyone. Any time you hear a bunch of self-hating teenage girls talking, it’s usually about how someone else looks better than them. It really hurts me knowing that most of my friends are so down on themselves, and instead of looking at their own talents and beauty, they constantly look at everyone else and they’re own talents are drowned out by those of others.
I agree as well. Ever since I found this website, I’ve had more positive thinking than i used to, but there’s something on here that’s true about me. I DO often compare myself to my friends and peers. I was doing it this afternoon actually- and now I wish I didn’t. Yes, my friends and peers are beautiful- BUT SO AM I!! Thanks for posting this.
I agree so much.. I’m fifteen going on sixteen and I know first hand how hard it is to except your size or so called imperfections, especially being in school having the criticism of other teens and comparing yourself to all the other people, because of what the media says we’re supposed to look like.
i am thirteen and i know how it is to not want to accept ur size….. i am going to try to start.
I hate the way I look and all my clothes, so I guess I give myself a lot of negative self-talk. No matter how hard I try, all I see is an ugly, fat girl in the mirror.
What do you see when you look DEEP inside? What kind of wonderful girl are you from the inside, out?
Trust me, I know how you feel. It stinks when you look in a mirrror and just think “why arent I skinnier? why cant I look like _____? I wish I was prettier…” But you know what? Try this trick, its working for me. Before you get in front of that mirror, think about how incredibly drop dead georgous you are, because you are. Then step in front of that mirror and keep thinking it. Any time you try to be negative, yell “SSHHH!!!” in your head or even out loud. Yell it any time you catch yourself being negative. Immediatly after, fill your head with positive thoughts. Trust me, keep it up as much as you can and eventually you wont have to yell shh, because you wont think negatively. Trust me, its been working for me and even though I still think bad things about myself, they are slowly being outnumbered by the good thoughts.
Also, if you are really specific about what you dont like about yourself, write them all down on a sheet of paper. Then crumble it up, and destroy it. Burn it, through it out, shred it, whatever it takes. Just remember girl, you are amazing. Being perfect is boring, so dont just accept who you are, embrace who you are! There’s only one you, so dont bother trying to be anybody else.
The responce posted by me made me cry. I’m 16 and over weight and constantly think horribly about myself to the point that even my mom tells me to stop saying such things about myself. My mom and all my friends are big girls and they have the most amazing self confidence, they never compare themselves to anyone else or care what anyone else thnks of them. I’ve always wondered why I don’t think the same, because I don’t care what others think but I still can’t shake off my insicurites about my size, I think its mostly because in socities eyes skinny is what people need to be, but I always wonder why? Not everyone is skinny like how socitey wants us to be, why can’t society accept people for who they are and what they look like?
don’t think that way about your self every one is different and some people are just meant to look ugly its not your falt that ur sooooooo ugly
I was once the same as you, I used to stand in the mirror and tell myself, ahh look at your thighs, why cant you be as skinny as “Jenna” why isnt your skin as nice as “Kristines” I never went out with my friends because I thought people were going to look down at me, I bullied myself constantly by the way I looked… Until one day my friends had convinced me to go out with them, I went out and had an absolute jol, no one cared what I looked like, as a matter of fact people were telling me what a beautiful person I was, ever since then iv been going out a lot and meeting so many people, the trick iv learnt is to find what you love about yourself, maybe its your eyes, hair or anything and flaunt it girl because you deserve to live the best life possible so start living it <3
I’m 13, in middle school, and I am definately in the type of school where the pressure is to be thinner, at least for me. The “popular girls” are all really thin and athletic. My best friend, actually, is who I compare myself to most of the time. Shes tall and lean, and boys love her. It gets on my nerves when she says her thighs are fat, they aren’t at all. It makes me feel worse because my thighs are at least double the size of hers, but I’ve been working out daily and I feel so much better about myself. I think I’m going to start leaving operation beautiful notes.
I hope you know how wonderful you are
That’s all that matters.
My friend who has not an ounce of fat on her body, always complains about her thighs and how fat she is. The funny thing is, she is the most gorgeous girl I know and she won’t accept it. I’ve completely accepted myself, even though there are a few things I can and want to change. I don’t understand why she doesn’t do the same.
Congratulations on being so strong and accepting of yourself! You are definitely a role model for lots of girls. I have been like your friend for a long time and it is hard for some people to see in the mirror what everyone else does. We can only control our own thoughts and how we react to those around us, we can’t change the way any one else sees us or themselves. Giving your friend lots of love and having her see how accepting and loving you are of your body is probably the best thing you can do.
Im glad your feeling better about yourself but dont think that to feel good you have to work out. ‘Cause you dont. Im also thirteen and I have the same issues. Most of my friends actually have the anorexic figure. I would always compare myself to them but(after lots of treatment for other issues) I finally realized why should I compare myself to them when Im not them. They are a totally different person! Yeah, so what, I got a bigger chest than them. My stomache may not be flat and I have muscular legs! Haha! But who cares! Im me and the only me there will ever be! So why try to change myself when Im pretty awesome the way I am. Im not perfect. I dont have the best body image or self esteem, and Im not a super model. But Im me and your you. Why change?
Hi Elizabeth. Im also thirteen and have some of the same issues. My friends have some very unrealisitic, almost anorexic, figure and I am constantly comparing. I admit im not the thinnest or the most athletic or muscular or what ever. But, after many months fo treatment(and im still doing this treatment) for other issues, I finally realized why am i comparing myself to them when im not them. Im me, they are an entirely different person! Its not fair for me to say, “Oh her stomache is soooo flat!” Im not her so what should i care. Thats sort of the point though, who really does care? Who cares if your 115lbs or 195. And i understand that being overweight or underweight are both not good for your health, ive been in both positions. Although im not happy with my current weight i know that its the best place for me. But reallly, who cares if you dont have big boobs or a firm tush or a flat stomache? Or in the guys position, whats it matter if you dont have rock hard abs or ripped biceps? Good for you if you are that person who looks like they are from the cover of a magazine, but we shouldnt strive to look like that. There are many more important things in life than boobs and muscles! Haha! Im not perfect, goodness im no where near it! But im also not TRYING to be! Its boooorrrrinnng! Be unique! Be different! Be confident in who YOU are!
Lots of Love Ladies! (:
~Julia
being 15, this is so inspiring to hear. I am so insecure about myself, but I am starting to realize that I am beautiful just the way I am. this has made my day!
I go to middle school and there are SOOOO many thin and beautiful girls.. i always negative self talk myslef but i reliazed SO WHAT IF YOU HAVE CURVES!? SO WHAT IF YOU ARE SHORT OR TALL OR FAT WHATEVER! the imortant thing is that YOUR BEAUTIFUL, people don’t just say “your beautiful” they mean it, & every single human being on the planet is BEAUTIFUL so remember it! <3
I first learned of Operation Beautiful after I read an interview in Teen Voices Magazine (www.teenvoices.com). Since then, I like to leave my messages in my library books before I return them!
I came across a news article today and it reminded me once again the importance our your mission. The article said that girls are turning to bulimia before they even reach puberty. (http://huff.to/mRZISM) It breaks my heart to see the way body image has impacted their lives. I hope Operation Beautiful continues to spread all over the world. I hope that EVERY person will hear our beautiful messages!
I know first-hand that constantly putting yourself down leads to nothing but trouble. I have struggled with it all my life and it hasn’t done anything good for me. It turned the person I once was, (strong, independant, and funny) into a sad, depressed person that I didn’t know anymore. What most people don’t realize is that being hard on yourself all the time can lead to some serious issues. Anorexia is just one of the effects of self hatred. I downgraded to one meal per day when I felt horrible about myself. I don’t know if that could be considered anorexia but I did loose a lot of weight and everyone noticed. I was never fat to begin with. I’m fourteen years old and going into high school. I got my first real boyfriend in February. After two months, he got fed up with me always feeling sad about the way I looked. We got into several arguments about it. It ended soon afterwards. Not many of my friends think like I do in that sense. It IS really hard in middle/high school to accept yourself. I, like many other girls, am trying to do so. Reading some of the Operation Beautiful articles is helping me to realize that I was wrong about how I looked. I’m just as beautiful as my friends. Maybe not in appearance, but in attitude.
I know what you mean. I am 13 and i have struggled with bulimia/anorexia for 2 years and i have just now since i saw this site though about what i was doing and started learningto accep myself. This happened when i found a note in my locker from someone who was doing the operation beautiful sticky notes at my school had heard my situation and started putting notes in my locker and thats when i knew i was worth it..Operation beautiful has helped me
I as a 15 year old teenager , am very guilty of this … i hate to say it but this article has opened my eyes to just how damaging that i can be to myself .. i have been dieting since i was about 10 . I do nothing but critique myself . I loook at this friend or that one and think “why am i not as skinny as her ” or “why is she the pretty one , why couldnt i be that beautiful” & from reading this article i have now decided to try to not compare myself , maybe i can be happy with my body if i don’t
You are BEAUTIFUL!!! I know you are, i know exactly what you are feeling but everytime you compare yourself to others just think:
wait, i am myself nothing can change that. I am talented, amazing, nothing can stand in my way, i am BEAUTIFUL .
Thank you ! Everybody is beautiful as i am working on this I hope that everybody here will work on it to , we are all beautiful people inside in out i can’t wait for each and everyone of us to see that !!!
I just feel like I would be happier if I lost 30lbs but it’s so hard it’s really hard
Trust me, 30 pounds heavier or lighter doesnt change who you are! You are so georgous and wonderful, just try to see it!
Everyone on operation beautiful is amazing! I try to find beauty in everyone
but i havent yet found true beauty in myself. But im slowly on my way! x
Everyone keep up with the motavational comments they are very insipational for everyone coming on this site to find themselves, like me
I am now proud to say I have fully accepted myself- flaws and all! “Happiness is not driven from perfection, but from looking past the flaws and accepting them.” (:
I’m fourteen, and all I do is look at other girls and wonder why arn’t I as skinny or beautiful as her. Many people have told me that I’m not fat or I’m not ugly but it’s hard to accept yourself when you are surrounded by so many skinny and beautiful girls who don’t pay any attention to you if you arn’t skinny and pretty. Their is so much pressure on teenage girls to look a certian way and for some it is hard but now after reading this site I am going to try and start to stop looking at everyones else perfections and try to focus on some of mine. X
at 16 to 17 yeasr old this all crashed down on me after starting up 2 years prior. Thank you OPBeaut, after today, at age 19, I am going to be a better woman and stop wishing to be something I’m not. XOXOXOOOO
Its nice to think that people tell you that you are beautiful…..I have gone thur thinking that I was never good enough or pretty but finally I hated feeling that way that this year I have decided to leave all that behind me! I am 17 and its time I start feeling beautiful, the beautiful person I was always but couldn’t see. I am so glad that this website helps people realize that they are perfect like Pink said “if you ever feel like you less then you are perfect to me”<3
As much as everything is inspiring and amazing on this site… it doesn’t affect me… I still don’t accept who I am, and most likely never will until I change myself. Until then, I’ll just stick with comparing…
I hope you can move towards acceptance, Alexia!
You can do it. Dont worry about what you look like, only think of who you are inside. I know its tough, but trust me. Youll be so happier and free when you let go of what you think you look like. I hope you make it through it, sister.
I’m fourteen, in middle school, and I used to compare myself to my model bestie. Then I realized I’m curvy and that it was a waste of time to try and change that. I love my body, and I hope for other teens to understand that there are different body types- not all of us are going to be skinny as a stick. Anyway now that i’ve stopped starving myself I can actually find clothes that fit =) Believe in yourself and in your body.
I used to get upset when size 0 suddenly didnt fit, then size 3 didnt fit, and so on, but then i realized that I am growing like everyone else. Just because Im not super thin but have hips doesnt mean that Im any less pretty than the girl who is so thin she must not eat. Thanks to a new friend showing me this, my life was changed and I cant wait to change some other people’s
I know the idea of this post is mainly about accepting your body size and shape, but I have another issue that I struggle with accepting. My skin. I’m 21, and I break out like I just hit puberty.
I makes me sad because I love my body, and I feel like I would have a pretty face IF I didn’t have skin like a bumpy, blotchy, rotten, red tomato (haha, what an image).
Anyways, I’ve been reading this website in hopes that one day I will be able to get it through my head that it’s just freakin’ skin and it doesn’t even matter.
And to all you lovely ladies worrying about the way your bodies look, I’m positive that you all are just gorgeous:)
I’m sure you’ve talked to a doctor, but do you think your skin condition could be an allergic reaction to something you are eating?
Maybe. I eat pretty clean (avoiding fast food/excessively processed foods, lots of veggies, etc), but an allergy is entirely possible. Good thinking:)
It may be an environmental/chemical allergy, too.
I don’t know if this is still a problem for you but that sounds a bit like chronic urticaria which is basically chronic hives. I have it and it sucks but there’s some stuff online about treatment and I’ve had mine under control for nearly six months
I’m in my fifties and teaching high school students. I realized recently that we spend much more time looking at other people and admiring them than we do looking at ourselves and admiring ourselves. I suggest we spend some time looking at photos of ourselves and in the mirror – NOT criticizing – but admiring like we do when we look at others. We always find the more familiar most attractive. Become more familiar with what you look like and LOVE IT!!
I’m a teenage girl, and the other day was picture day. So i got up early and curled my hair, and put on a little more makeup than usual. During the day, a really nice, outgoing girl im kind of friends with but don’t really know too well told me a few times how amazing i looked. Then, she wrote on my wall on facebook telling me im the most gorgeous girl she knows and i look perfect every day. Of course i really appreciated this and was touched by how nice she was especially considering we dont know each other very well. And of course (as it usually is with teenage girls) i think she’s prettier.
So anyway, it made me realize something. Ive always been told im pretty but that was never really good enough for me…i wanted to be one of the mosttt pretty girls, one of the ones that everyone stares at and is jealous of (im kind of competitive..)and i never knewww if i was quite thattt pretty. But after being told that i am, it hasn’t helped any. I dont feel any different about myself and i actually felt bad that the other girl was comparing herself to me and putting herself down, because clearly we’re both different and she’s beautiful. So, other people telling you you’re gorgeous and they’re jealous of you isnt going to make you love yourself anymore…thats up to you!=)
this is a good website………Your Are Beautiful……J>D
hey people call me a slut ! Just because of the large no. of bfs i had..What should i do ?
The next time someone calls you a slut to your face, I would say, “Look – I’m not a slut, and I do not appreciate you calling me one. I would never call someone such a name, and if we can’t resolve this between the two of us, maybe we should get someone else involved.” Consider telling a teacher you like. This is BULLYING and you don’t have to take it.
I would reply, “Your opinion of me is none of my business.” or “Thanks for sharing”
i hate my body and my bff is super thin, so if we go swimming and we both were bikini’s i feel fat. sometimes i cry myself to sleep saying i’m fat. i usually eat when i’m sad, but the more i eat the fatter i feel, the fatter i feel the more i eat :’(
Mabel, I am so sorry that you feel this way. I am sure you are beautiful and though your friend may be skinnier than you, that doesn’t make you any less beautiful. I’m not sure of your religious affiliation, but I believe that God created us all exactly how he wants us to be and that means that you are a beautiful person. Don’t let yourself feel bad because you aren’t as skinny as your friend, because that doesn’t make beauty, what makes beauty is what’s on the inside. That is really all that matters. Instead of crying, think of all the good things you have going for you. There’s a psychological way about our thought process that makes us think of the worst things possible when we feel bad instead of lifting ourselves up; it is most important to think of the good things about ourselves, especially when we feel bad. I will be praying for you, just remember that you are a beautiful person, despite how you views yourself in comparison to your friend. I know it’s easier said than done, but I have faith in you!
I am extremely self concious about my body.
I am 15 I have always tried to stay happy and tell myself i mean so much more than i thought i did. I get told everyday by my friends that they think im pretty or i have a good smile or im beautiful and i don’t believe it….I have a bad life at home at school theres just so much drama….and about a year ago i was happy i was so happy but then my grandma passed away i wasnt ever the same i started cutting at first it was small didn’t really think anything of it but then i went deeper and deeper you think you can do anything with that kind of rush but when i didn’t get a rush from that anymore I tried other things i thought i was fat so i stopped eating or if i would eat 10 minutes later i wold throw it up i was failing school….i had no one to talk to…but then i found a note in a public restroom it say “you are BEAUTIFUL:)” I felt important and i felt like i ment something like i was IMPORTANT….To anyone who reads this you are worth it you are important and you do matter don’t let anyone tell you you don’t or you’re not YOU ARE AMAZING AND YOU ARE IMPORTANT YOU ARE LOVED!!!!!!!
i feel like im the only one in the with being self countious about being to skinny, all i hear is everyone wanting to be thinner but iv been teased about bein to skinny since the third grade im 23 now 5 foot 6 inches and weigh about 100 lbs i have no chest or no butt. iv had three babies trying to gain weight i just seem to go back down as soon as the baby comes out i eat everything and i just cant gain weight i wear sweats to try in look like im bigger but mainly i dont leave the house unless i have to. most of the peole now say i could be a model but im not a model im just stuck in this world lookin like a bag of bones you have to know the right people to become a model so no matter how much people tell me that i still think im a skeleton with skin because in reality im not a model im a nobody that cant gain weight
This website has opened my eyes, I am fifteen and will be sixteen on December 14, I know after being bullied for years how other people can affect your own vision of yourself. I have a LOT of medical problems thart prevent me from losing weight without other health problems occuring. I do keep comparing myself to my best friend she is so beautiful and HATES her body I am going to introduce her to this website and together we will post notes anywhere we can! WE’RE BEAUTIFUL!
I am 16 and 300lbs (medical probs) I have always worried that I will never fin someone to love me because I don’t love myself! What should I do?
I am sorry about your medical problems!! I think it’s important for us all – no matter what we look like – to work on bettering ourselves. Being the kindest, most giving and thoughtful person we can be. Volunteering, helping others. That is what makes you attractive to a partner- having a big heart!
This is very true, and I am most definitely guilty of this. A few years ago, I started comparing myself to others. I didn’t let it rule how I felt about my body, but the feelings were there, buried deep. Shortly after, I developed Myalgic Encephalopathy, so I am barely able to attend school for a morning, let alone exercise. Since then, my weight has increased a lot and I have gone up from a UK size 8 (US 6), to a UK 12 (US 10) , so my body confidence has dropped to an all-time low, as I compare myself to other, healthy girls. The rational, intelligent part of me knows that A: I can’t help putting on weight, it happens to a lot of ME sufferers, B: I am going through puberty, so I will put on weight anyway,C: There is nothing wrong with a size 12, and D: I am naturally curvy anyway, so I will not be as skinny as my athletic friends. So the question is, when I know there isn’t anything wrong with how I look, really, and even if there was, I can’t help it, why do I still compare myself? Currently, I am seeing a psychologist to try and find out, and I hope it works out for me, and everybody else trying to accept themselves for the wonderful people they are. (Ha, I think this is the longest comment I have ever made to any post on any website! You sure know how to coax a reply out of me!).
My students told me about this website.
Thank you, girls~
Mrs.Eby
I have a general question…Even though people say that I am beautiful and I am perfect the way i am, I still don’t believe them. However much my mom says it me, I don’t feel like it is true. I feel like she just is lying to make me feel better, and that the real answer is opposite to what she says…Why is that?
Comparing myself to others is what gets me the most. For the last year I’ve been struggling terribly with self esteem and my image. (It’s focused on my hair and skin. I’m at an average, healthy weight) but that’s one of the things that bothers me. Everyone tells me that I’m beautiful and they talk about my body being beautiful, but sure whatever because I’m content with it. But I feel like my FACE and HAIR are hideous….and I so bad that sometimes I skip school and stay home, or don’t go out on weekends with my friends because they all have “perfect” skin and “perfect” long, shiny hair…I used to have really long hair, but then I cut it into a little bob that went maybe an inch and a half past my jaw in the front. I really liked it at first, but then I began to hate it and so I kept dying it over and over…and now I’m trying to let it grow and it’s growing so slowly because of the damage… (it’s just barely at my shoulders in the back now) and I can’t stand to go out in public because I see everyone with their great hair and skin, and they are all so happy. I just want to be happy again. My hair could do whatever it wanted, and so could my skin, as long as I could just be happy again and continue to live my life and have fun like I used to without beating myself up. I had a cutting problem but I’ve stopped for a while, but I’m so scared I’m going to start again…I’m starting therapy next week and I’ve been going on this site and really trying to change the way I SEE, but it’s as if I have a body dysmorphia, and every time I look in the mirror I’m filled with disgust and hatred towards myself.
I’m really, really trying to accept myself and realize that I’m simply me, and that’s that, hair is hair and skin is skin….but I’ve blown things so far out of proportions that it’s pathological…thin girls can hurt, too. But it’s like people don’t get that, and when I tell a close friend that I think I’m ugly, they say “but you’re so thin!” and they don’t even listen when I tell them it’s from the neck up that I’m killing my happiness over.
I just want to smile back at my reflection and walk outside, happy, without anxiety.
I’m 14, and a freshman in high school. Pressure has never been so bad. In gym class, we’re pressured about our BMI and pretty much outcasted if it’s not where it should be. I’m very active, competitive, and I participate more than most of the “skinny” girls in my gym class. Ever since last year, I started posting sticky notes everywhere. I made it my goal to make everyone else feel beautiful, and I forgot to make myself feel beautiful. Recently dumped and cheated on, I’ve hit this stage of “I’m ugly and worthless.” My doctor even tells me I’m “fat” and has ever since I was a child. On the inside, my self esteem is in the gutter. Somehow I still find the confidence to walk down the halls at school everyday, pretending to be proud to be me. I always look at the other girls, and wish that I could look like them. If comparing yourself to others was a crime, I’d be guilty as charged. It bothers me when skinny girls complain about being “fat” when I wish they could step a day in my shoes and see if they don’t change their minds. I have such a poor self image..
When I look at people at my school, I notice how great they are. And sometimes I see girls who are not super confident. And for each and everyone of them to this day, I ‘ve written a poem, or told them in real life, what i think makes them unique, special, and what part of them is truly beautiful.
With that, you might think I have self confidence. I dont. My looks have improved somewhat over the years, and sometimes i do think i’m prettyish. But I’ve got a few extra kilos, and no boobs at all, and I’m short with fat in the wrong places (not on my butt, or my hips, but on my belly, and my arms.)
Also, I hate my nose. I can deal with the length of it, or the bumps. What I cant deal with is that it makes me look eviil. Once I overheard a little kid say, “I ‘m scared of that girl. Look at her nose; she looks really weird and mean.” I really wouldnt mind the rest if my face looked like the face of a nice person, because I am truly nice.
At thirteen, I started liking my body image better. And then one day, my mom, (who’s so skinny I dont even think it looks that pretty) started telling me I shouldnt eat as much. She called me fat, jokingly, and then she said i was chubby, not jokingly. She commented on all I ate.
My brothers picked up on it and now they call me fat all the time.
I’m fifteen now, and I love what you are doing, because it gives hope to girls like me. I truly wish one day I had found a note like this in the bathroom.
I have a really bad relationship with my mother, based on fear mostly. I dont think I’m very fat anymore, but I never confide to my mother for anything since those days. It feels horrible being betrayed by the people who should love you the most. I really am digressing, but I would like to encourage every person in Operation Beautiful, on the behalf of all the teenage girls who never had a sister, a mother, a cousin or a friend to tell them they were beautiful.
With love,
Anonymous who’s proud of her long nose.
Honestly girls, hearing all this made me cry. im 18 nearly 19 and im still thinking the same about my body.
in a bind to be thin i did a stupid diet that i lost a stone and a half in 3 weeks. i was dangerously ill. fainting etc. thinking it would have helped it hasnt. i struggle to eat now. its a chore for me. and i was a girl who LOVED her food. makes me sad now. sort it as soon as you can cause you dont wanna be in the state i am when you are at the most important and fun time of your life!!!!!!!!!!!! good luck girlies!
I think that peer pressure does play a part in body dismorphic disorder, but it seems to me that even with peer pressure, the top tier (the ones who cause the pressure of the other girls) must get their idea of beauty somewhere; with that being said, I happen to think that this psychological disorder begins with the media and that creates the bodies of the peers that cause others to desire that specific body type.
Well to angel and Hebe. You are both beautiful. Love yourselff for who you are. Be confident that’s the bet beauty. Tell itself vryday ‘ I am so beautiful ‘
Teenage girls all judge each other. We are all BEAUTIFUL! We are all humans!<3
Most girls in my school stand in the bathroom complaining about their bodies and their personality…i just stand their wanting to cry because when my father went suicidal…he always told me i was a beautiful angel and nobody would ever change that. NO zit, scar, or scratch would ever change me for who i am…. I was SierraRene’e Nobody will change me!
I would always go to random places to see all these people i thought were better than me. I still look at myself as ugly because, my older sister stands in the mirror and goes”Dont you wish you were as skiny as me? As pretty as me? As loved as me?” As an older sister somebody i look up to that hurts…and it doesnt help that we are in the same middle school…all the guys i start to “FALL” for come up and say ” Dang your sister is hot! Why dont you look like her?” And thats when i give up hope and ask for my dads help and remember “I AM BEAUTIFUL ON THE INSIDE NO MATTER WHAT THEY ALL SAY!!”
Ah, iv’e really tried to tell myself i’m fine the way I am. But I hate the way I look, always have. I must of changed my look about a million times now, now matter how hard I try I just can’t be positive about my appearance.
i found a note in my library book today and it said youre beautiful! keep your head up! i cannot tell you how good that made feel! i got this big goofy grin on my face and everything! i looked up the website and i think that its awesome. i mean alot of stuff that people are saying i can strongly relate to. but i have a question. this is probably going to make you think im super dumb but idk what the answer is. what is beautiful???? or being pretty?? or gorgeous?? ive been tring so hard to be one of those and i really dont even know what they are. i try so hard to be beafutiful and and i try to meet everybody elses standards and try so hard impress other people and win their approval and praise that i dont even know how to be me anymore. ive tried puking to losse weight to look better but when i do that i dont feel pretty at all, and ya i lost a few pounds but weight isnt the only thing that makes you beatiful. theres my face, and my hair and my teeth and all that other stuff. people have told me my eyes are pretty and that my eyelashes are gorgeous and long and they say my hair is absolutly beautiful. but does that make me pretty? i mean thats like things about me. not me in genral. its just like i dont even know what im striving to be anymore. well i do. im trying to be someone im not yet the problem is….. i dont even kow who im even supposed to be. whos me.
real beautiful is on the inside
you are inherently beautiful because you are you!
everybody is beautiful its just how we use our beauty and talents,not to destory/beat up yourself about.never be a downer on yourself
you are amaingly beautiful just the way you are