The Mission

The goal of the Operation Beautiful website is to end negative self-talk or “Fat Talk.”  If this little blog only does one productive thing, I hope it helps readers realize how truly toxic negative self-talk is  — it hurts you emotionally, spiritually, and physically. 

 

Through my own experiences fighting Fat Talk, I’ve realized the power behind an anonymous act such as Operation Beautiful.  When I post a note, I’m saying, “I CHOOSE to be positive!”

 

I began Operation Beautiful by leaving positive messages on the mirrors of public restrooms — at work, at the gym, at the grocery store.  I scribble down whatever comes to mind — "You are beautiful!" or "You are amazing just the way you are!"  My personal goal is to leave as many Operation Beautiful notes as I can. Maybe some people read them and just smile, but I bet some people are truly touched by the effort of a random stranger. 

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Operation Beautiful is simple: all you need is a pen and a piece of paper.  If you want to join the mission, send me an e-mail at seebriderun@gmail.com with a photograph of your Operation Beautiful note or a description of your experience, and I’ll post it on the Operation Beautiful site for thousands of others to read and enjoy!

{ 19 trackbacks }

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Banning “Fat Talk” « Tales of a (Recovering) Disordered Eater
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Passing on the “Feel Good” Feeling « Defying Gravity
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{ 590 comments… read them below or add one }

Jane May 5, 2010 at 5:13 pm

How come my message has a tag on it saying its up for moderation? Dont you want people to know some people have concerns about this idea.

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admin May 5, 2010 at 5:16 pm

Jane: All comments on Operation Beautiful are moderated to prevent SPAM. We never mind a variety of comment types. OB is not just for “overweight” or “anorexic” women. It’s not about “being fat.” It’s deeper than that if you try to see… Sometimes everyone can use a pick me up, a reminder that they are beautiful on the inside and the outside. I’m sorry a random note from someone who wanted to send out a message of good will did not make you happy.

Caitlin

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Jane May 5, 2010 at 6:03 pm

if the message had simply said ‘ you are beautiful
that might have been nice but it continued to say ‘ just the way you are’ which tells me someone either has a negative image of me or presumes I do. Its one thing putting these messages in restrooms but to put it on someones someones car makes it personal and it could be insulting.

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admin May 5, 2010 at 6:10 pm

I think you should try to relax – insulting is when a stranger keys your car or pops your tires. :) There is nothing insulting about what that person wrote. It was a nice gesture and if it’s not for you… that’s OK.

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Jane May 7, 2010 at 12:16 am

I dont think you understand what insulting means.to key someones car is not insulting but hateful the comment made to me suggests someone thinks either im fat when im not or I have a negative self image which I dont. I appreciate this may well be the case for some people and appears the case of many of your supporters but there needs to be guidelines in place to prevent some people making personal comments.im a psychotherapist with much experience in this field.you need to be careful doing this to ensure someones ego is not being groomed at someone elses expense.

Dana May 24, 2010 at 10:49 pm

Cant you be happy? Someone is just trying to tell random people that they are perfect. putting “just the way you are” is saying that you dont need possesions, makeup, new fast cars, or anything like that to be beautiful. It is actually pretty important to say just as you are, because most people think that the Guchi handbag, the prada boots, and the Channel 5 perfume make the person who they are, but thats not the truth at all. It is whats inside that makes a person, whats inside that REALLY matters. I just wish I had realized this sooner than I did myself. Trying to go by whats new in fashion onlt made me more and more stressed out, and after a long time, I started to get scuicidal because I was always under so much pressure to look good, and I always felt there was something wrong with me which made me even more stressed. Now that Ive learned that those things are not whats important, so much stress has been releived from me that I can hang around with my REAL freinds, the ones who dont judge me on who I am outside, but the ones who like me for who I am on the inside. And Ive never felt better to tell the truth. And Im sure that just like me, the person who put the note on your car just wanted you to feel the joy of living happily again too.

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John June 4, 2010 at 4:27 pm

Hey all. Jane’s got a point. It was my first concern too when my girlfriend started doing the mission. Sometimes a positive message can contain a subtext that implies something’s wrong with the person reading it. Just be careful with the wording.

Adrianna July 10, 2010 at 5:38 pm

Hey! Jane, I think you need to calm down a bit.

Operation beautiful is about looking past your outward appearances and seeing how beautiful you are ‘inside’. You can be lovely on the inside and out but you’ll never know it unless you look inside yourself. Many people doubt that they are pretty on the inside because people say they aren’t on the outside. You ARE nice just the way you are because no matter how you look- fat or skinny, tall or short- you are you and that’s all the matters. As long as you try to find the best and people and read the note for what it really is, encouraging, it shouldn’t be a problem.

If someone keys your car and says ‘you’re fat and ugly and I hate you’ it’s mean as well as insulting but the notes are meant to be neither. I, myself, have put up many similar notes and they are supposed to make you feel warm and happy inside, not cold and withdrawn. Some people feel lonely and hated because of a few bullies and these little notes and reminders really cheer some people up. Being lonely is like starving your heart and that’s bad.

These notes are meant to help you see the world a little bit brighter. Just because you don’t agree, doesn’t mean people are trying to be insulting or cruel.

Panda May 5, 2010 at 10:18 pm

Something really sad happened at school today. The entire school watched a movie about bullying, and “bullyside”-bullying someone to the point that they commit suicide. This needs to stop. Operation Beautiful is doing an excellent job, and should totally continue. However, I think that Operation Beautiful needs to extend her wings to help not only girls and women, but boys and men as well. Okay, so maybe the name will have to be changed to “Operation Handsome” but the principle is the same. There are so many stories out there about this; why doesn’t anyone do something about it? I’ve seeen so much bullying at my school, but I don’t step in as often as I can or should; I regret it every day. But even worse is that teachers dont seem to do anything about it either. Aren’t they suppost to be our role models? We need to do something about this. Now.

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admin May 5, 2010 at 11:46 pm

OB has definitely be used by men and for men, too! Everyone can participate and you’re right – we all need to hear this message!

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Nuggets May 29, 2010 at 2:48 pm

I think it mostly goes out to girls & women because they worry more about weight, even though there are guys that do too, girls and women are more emotionally and physically effected by it .

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Hayley May 10, 2010 at 5:51 am

Thanku so much for all ure help. This website is doing a wonderful thing 4 a lot of self conscious people and even people who just want a pik me up. Ure site makes so many realise that they are beautiful people no mater what anyone tries to tell them and you saved my friends life so i can never thank u more. We r all beautiful and strong as long as we are ourselvs.

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Ashley May 10, 2010 at 12:42 pm

Ahh… I’m so annoyed. One girl that choked me thee times earlier in the year, keeps bugging me, saying we’re best friends, etc. I’ve even said to her “I don’t want to be around you.” IDK what to do.

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admin May 10, 2010 at 7:16 pm

Can a teacher help?

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Lexi June 18, 2010 at 12:47 am

If you feel that she is a threat, you should definitely tell someone, like a parent, teacher, ect. You could also try to talk to her, telling her why you don’t feel like your “best friends” and that you’d like her to leave her alone. Tell her that you can’t trust her anymore because of what she did to you. However, don’t do that if you feel that it could put you in danger. The best thing to do would probably be to tell an adult, for your safety. Hope I helped a bit!

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Kinda May 12, 2010 at 7:16 pm

Vergeeet nooit je bent mooi! Wees er trots op! Laat andere ook voelen dat ze mooi zijn. Doe mee! Maak post-its en hang ze overal!
Voorbeeld;

You’re wonderful, beautiful <3
What are you not?
operationbeautiful.com

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Natasha May 18, 2010 at 10:43 pm

Hello, I just wanted to say that I got a comment on my Formspring that was very sweet! It said “you are beautiful” with a link to this website. I have to say that I was very touched, and to thank whomever it was that posted it. You made my day! I’ve been getting rude “annymous” comments on my blog and Formspring, so this was a refreshing change! Thank you for making a positive difference!
natashaatkerson.blogspot.com

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Lexi June 18, 2010 at 12:47 am

awww, im so going to do that!

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Marah May 24, 2010 at 4:03 pm

thank you so much for the work you are doing with operation beautiful. My youth pastor noticed that i was involved and liked the idea so much that she asked me to speak to her girls group to tell them about this and get them started. ive never been more excited to speak to a bunch of girls in my life. thank you so much.

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Maks May 24, 2010 at 9:58 pm

A few weeks ago my entire school, and the surrounding area was covered in operation beautiful postits. all different people had written them, so im guessing it was an organized thing (im guessing from the GSA because they brought up operation beautiful before). people had also put up blank post its, and me and my friends wrote a bunch of them too. I have to say, I was having a really bad day, and this really brightened it. so thanks operation beautiful, and everyone involved in it.

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ellen May 24, 2010 at 10:25 pm

the other day, i was reading posts on gmh and i noticed that people were talking about random acts of kindness, a lot of them having to do with a simple compliment. I decided to send EVERYONE in my phonebook, 200+ people, a text that simply read, you are beautiful in every way imaginable! dont you EVER let anyone make you feel otherwise =]. as soon as i sent, i got about 150 texts back saying, huh? do u have the wrong person? thanks? and aw you’re such a sweetie. later, my friend texted me back telling me that she had been having a horrible night, stressing out and crying because of her ex boyfriend. she then proceded to tell me that it was exactly what she needed and that it made things a little easier. im clinically depressed, but once i did that random act of kindness, some of the weight lifted off my chest, and i kinda got that warm and fuzzy feeling inside. complimenting someone, and having them tell you that it helped in someway shape or form, not only made me and everyone else smile, but it;s one step closer to having a better world

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Madison July 17, 2010 at 6:27 pm

that is beautiful, and so are YOU! :)
i did the exact same thing a couple weeks ago and although it felt incredible to know that i was helping out my best friend, it amazed me how many people didnt appreciate it. why not just take the compliment, feel good and carry on? :)
anyway…you did an amazing thing and you are such a wonderful person! dont ever forget that, beautiful :)

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Tiare May 30, 2010 at 3:36 am

What you are doing is amazing. It is so touching that you actually want to stop fat talk, because everyone knows it happens everyday. You will completely change the way girls think about themselves and you are one amazing person to start this website.

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Stacey June 4, 2010 at 4:31 am

I am a server in Key West Florida and tonight I was waiting on two young girls… They paid with a credit card and the copy they left me said : ” You are beautiful…. operationbeautiful.com”. It was a wonderful end to my long shift!!!!

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HOLY ACKLES June 7, 2010 at 6:56 pm

HEY thank you so much i found a note today in my school bathroom on the wall and it was just so nice to see it said your beautiful and 2day i was rly not feeling to good about my self so thank you .!!!! :) :)

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Lana June 8, 2010 at 9:31 pm

Kids at my school in the g.y.r.l.s. club put post its up everywhere in the school. So, just about every girl that saw one would take them off the walls, lockers, boards, desks, bathroom doors… etc. I loved them (:

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Shayna June 13, 2010 at 3:23 am

Thank you for starting this — an operation to feel beautiful is far superior to one with a scalpel because I don’t feel beautiful!

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kaitlyn June 15, 2010 at 2:53 am

God bless everyone who participates with this website, you are truly making a difference in someones life. keep up the amazing job everyone <3 God Bless!

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kaitlyn June 19, 2010 at 3:09 am

I just wanted to let you know that I just went on “mystery seeker” and put this message in “you are beautiful don’t let anyone tell you otherwise” The entire point of mystery seeker is that you put a message in and click search. You see someone else’s search and the next person to search sees your search. That way someone else was seeing this message that I left for them. Thank you operation beautiful for inspiring me.

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Nicole June 19, 2010 at 5:30 am

people always come up to me and say OH YOUR SO SKINNY or call me anorexic, and i’m not. i think im really fat. i eat WAYYY too much, i am addicted to working out, i wear skinny jeans because i think they make me look thinner, i have gotten to the point where people MAKE FUN of me for being too thin and i cry myself to sleep. what do i do?
HELP!

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admin June 19, 2010 at 1:21 pm

Is there a friend or family member you can reach out to? maybe a guidance counselor at school? or try calling the NEDA helpline for advice. get help before it spirals out of control! 800-931-2237

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Kay:) June 26, 2010 at 2:32 am

heyy..,, i know that we dont know each other but, im the same way i eat like a pig and wear skinny jeans to look skinner..,,, and i still think that i am very fat… people always call me a stick and just make fun of me for the fun of it. i really started to get affected by it and would cry everyday on the bus….. but after a little while i started to think what if i just loved the way i was. i mean god made me the way i am and i should be happy that i am even on the earth…. so all i am saying is be happy for how you look and know that you are beautiful in your very own way.. just fallow my advice and be happy:)

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Madison July 17, 2010 at 6:33 pm

i cant say that i am the same way but throughout this school year i starved myself because i thought i was too fat. i am actually a very healthy weight, a little too skinny now but i love my body. every inch of it. i learned this year that no one but yourself can make you feel good about your body…i am now able to look at myself and just see the good things! i promise you can do that too!

you are BEAUTIFUL, and dont let anyone…not even yourself…tell you otherwise.

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Felicia Pommer June 24, 2010 at 5:39 am

I found my first “Smile, You look beautiful” note at the supermarket today and went home and typed in the website… Love what you guys are doing… Its just what i have been needing. Im always down on myself becuse people always feel the need to bring it to my attention that I am over weight. Im beautiful and don’t need other peoples approval

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Beth June 25, 2010 at 1:40 am

I am so happy that I found something that can help me restore my confidents in myself. I have always wanted to look beautiful in the world’s eyes but never seemed to be able to do it. I found this when looking at some superchic[k] videos and the operation beautiful popped up and I clicked on it and after watching the video I wanted to come here and look up ways to help out the mission. This is the most amazing thing I have ever seen. When I’m out in public next I will leave sticky notes and take pictures for the website. Thank you Caitlin for starting this up for every girl who needs a little boost of confidents for each day.

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Madison July 17, 2010 at 6:37 pm

YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL!
the worlds eye sees it too, everyone sees this in you!
dont forget it and dont ignore it :)

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Thoughtsappear June 28, 2010 at 2:32 pm

What a great idea! I think notes would bring a smile to anyone’s face.

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Layna June 28, 2010 at 9:03 pm

operation beautiful is such an amazing thing. now adays girls are really feeling the presure to be pretty and skinny. im 13 and i can barley go a day with out make up. girls at school are always calling themselves ugly or fat, even when there super skinny or absoulty beautiful. operation beautiful gives hope that girls can someday feel confident about themselves no matter what. this is an amazing thing going on write here, we should all be proud < 3

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ctall July 3, 2010 at 5:17 am

I had to respond…I am almost 32 and remember feeling this way when I was ages 9-25. I always wore full-on make-up and only wore clothes that I thought made me look thinner/prettier. As I grew older and really had genuine friends that I could confide in without feeling like I was judged (and I’m talking 24 or 25 years old) I realized that almost EVERY woman I talked to felt the same way. Even the frineds I had that were totally still skinny felt like their arms were too big! I was like….seriously, your ARMS!!

I honestly believe that every woman has some issue/s with thier bodies. Too tall, too short, too skinny, too fat, big nose, flat hair, big pores…I could go on, but you get the pic.

I really hope you don’t feel like I’m some middle-aged lady that doesn’t get it, because I do, I do, I do. We all do. We are all beautiful for one reason or another…just like we can find so many negatives…there are also many positives, too. We just have to accept all of it. Love this website and the message it’s putting out there.

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caro July 3, 2010 at 1:08 am

caitlin, i have just come accross your site….brilliant and beautiful!! i blog about things i love….you have just made it on my page…i love this idea, so simple! i am based in sydney, and i am now going to start it here, leaving notes, with your address at the bottom, for people to track back to you…watch out australia here comes operation beautiful! x c
hhtp/carowithlove.blogspot
thank-you

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Atlee July 6, 2010 at 1:38 am

I just simply wanted to say thank you! Sometimes I get so depressed that I feel like I am trapped inside my own mind! Thank you for setting me free!

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Jordan July 7, 2010 at 3:13 am

I love this soooo much!!! I’m starting to do this! :) )) Thank you sooo much!

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Faby July 14, 2010 at 3:48 pm

This is an amazing cause! Thank you! the world NEEDS this now!

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Love yourself July 14, 2010 at 4:14 pm

Just wanted to say im SOLD

love this idea.. made me cry reading through the above comments.

i am having a hard time .. as a lot of us are… was in an abusive relationship. Now with the love of my life.. i finally know what soul mate really means. (i wish this feeling for everyone)

yet i am still down… i think this would be a great project for me (for anyone really) thank you for the idea… i stumbled upon this website by accident … have not seen a post it or note around the city, but im going to change that.

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admin July 14, 2010 at 5:05 pm

I can’t wait to see your notes!

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Katie July 15, 2010 at 7:01 am

I was suicidal and depressed in my middle school years, because I was phased and thought I was fat, even though I was anorexic. I pulled out of my anorexia, and didn’t think about suicide again until the ninth grade, where I again felt fat at average weight and tried to diet. I became anorexic (again) and suicidal (again). I was thinking about how I was going to kill myself while I went to the school bathroom, and saw a note that said “Smile! You’re beautiful! http://www.OperationBeautiful.com
Thanks so, so, so, so, so much!!! You saved my life, and I’m a happy sophomore with good grades and an amazing guy, along with fantastic friends!

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Madison July 17, 2010 at 6:40 pm

i found this website this summer and i am planning on bringing to my school when the year begins, in the mean time i am posting sticky notes all around! i keep one in my mirror because i suffer with extreme body image problems, whenever i am feeling down and just visit this website and it makes me feel so much better about the world and about myself! i love this so much, it is truly amazing!
you are all beautiful!!

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Kell July 23, 2010 at 6:32 am

You have been awarded The Versatile Blogger Award on my site, Kincavel Krosses. Please come and collect it. :)

http://kincavelkrosses.wordpress.com/2010/07/23/first-blog-award-the-versatile-bogger-award/

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Taylor July 23, 2010 at 7:22 am

I’ve never been very confident & im terrible at taking compliments..
My fiance purposed to me by writing ” Smile, your beautiful” & ” You are my princess” & ” You are the reason I breath” and ect. each different and posting them on my bedroom wall spelling out ” Will you marry me “

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admin July 23, 2010 at 1:49 pm

I LOVE IT :) SO SWEET. CONGRATS ON YOUR ENGAGEMENT!

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lily July 31, 2010 at 6:46 am

YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL OPERATIONBEAUTIFUL<333333333333333333

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Jackie February 15, 2010 at 11:50 pm

Thanks for linking to my blog! I was checking out my “blog stats” and saw you guys referred people over! I love the work you guys do and how many people support it (including me!), so keep it up :)

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